


Feelings Jam. Now.

by Ziddia



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Dubious Consent, F/M, Fluff, Random - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-27
Updated: 2011-12-27
Packaged: 2017-10-28 05:53:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,901
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/304452
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ziddia/pseuds/Ziddia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Aradia visits Equius to have a feelings jam, and things get all awkwarded up.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Feelings Jam. Now.

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this as a little one-shot side project to try and get me back into writing. I'm none too impressed by it, but I figured I'd post it anyway. Also, I don't watch romance movies. Bear with me.
> 
> My dA: ziddia.deviantart.com  
> My Tumblr: ziddia.tumblr.com

You're not sure what exactly attracts you to Equius. Before the game, he was just some troll on your chums list - Nepeta's moirail. That was pretty much all you knew about him.

After you had died, there hadn't really been much to do. Noone had been able to see you, so obviously your feelings didn't have any reason to grow like they have.

Once you became the robot, your feelings for Equius became a nightmare. Half the time, you wanted to murder him; the other half, you wanted to kiss him. Your strange relationship definitely didn't bring you any closer. You hated him as much as you loved him.

When you ascended, you hadn't really had the chance to think about feelings. There was always so much to do. Humans and trolls always needed your help, everyone was always in trouble... And then, of course, once he died, you definitely couldn't talk to him properly.

Later, once the game was over, and everyone had met up again on the new Earth, you had come to know him a bit better. Without the pressures of your position on your shoulders, you could begin to focus more on your own feelings. He was really a wonderful troll on the inside, no matter what his outside appearance may make him seem like.

Of course, none of this explains why you are at his house, uninvited, trying to force the two of you to 'have a feelings jam'. You can't see him at the moment. He might be out in the fields, tending to all the hoofbeasts that he somehow came into possession when they landed on Earth after the game ended. Perhaps you could just walk around there and meet hi- oh, never mind. He just walked out the door.

It's clear that he wasn't expecting to see you. You see the sweat begin to bead on his brow as he suddenly stops walking. His eyes are focused on you, as you decide to walk towards him. It's clear that he won't be moving for a little - it's probably taking all of his energy just to contain his strange sweating. You'll have to ask him about all of that some day.

You're right beside him now, and the proximity is making you feel even more nervous than you already are. And, of course, he still hasn't moved. That's not like him; he's normally very polite. Then again, he practically already admitted a flush for you. He's probably nervous to even have you show up at his home.

You cough slightly, and he seems to snap back to reality. He invites you into his home, and you, of course, graciously accept. It would be rude not to, and regardless, it's been the whole point of your trip here to visit him. It would be stupid to decline.

"And to what do I owe the pleasure of this visit?" he said cooly, trying to hide his nervous sweating and the blush that was rising in his cheeks.

"Oh, you know. Just... Passing through, and thought I would say hello." you reply, shifting in your chair slightly. His staring is making you feel a little uncomfortable about your appearance - it takes all your willpower not to fiddle with your hair or your dress.

"But... There's a storm coming through today! Its not like I can let you go out into that on your own, pea- I mean, Aradia..."

You are well aware of this storm. You have timed your visit very precisely to ensure that you will both be stuck in the middle of this storm for at least a whole day. You're also slightly impressed by his abandonment of blood-color titles. It's nice to know that he can make himself call you by your name.

"Whoops! I had no idea! I guess I'll have to stay over a while, until the storm blows over," you say, struggling to stifle a giggle as he reaches for the towel besides his chair. Okay, maybe you took it a little too far. Oh well. It's in the past. As always.

He sighs, knowing that there's not really much else that he can do. It's not like he can kick you out into the storm, and there's no way he would leave himself. His hoofbeasts can't be left alone.

You have the opportunity you need, now: at least one whole day with Equius, alone. Without anyone else to distract you from your flush.

•••

It's later that evening, and you've just had dinner with Equius. It was an interesting experience, carried out in complete silence. It's almost as though he's avoiding talking to you, which is kind of silly. You very much doubt that that is what's going on.

Eating on Earth is a different experience than eating on Alternia as well. For one, the food is plenty different. There's no real meats like 'pork' and 'beef' on your home planet, and there's definitely no vegetables. You're sure you would remember so rich a taste if you had ever tried it.

After a brief - very brief - discussion with Equius, he agrees to watch a movie with you. Just for fun, and to fulfill your little mischievous streak, you decide to make it a human redrom. See how he reacts to that.

You're kind of surprised that he even has a movie like that. It's not exactly the type of movie you would expect him to watch. He is quick to explain that it's more for Nepeta than himself - his moirail enjoyed redrom movies more than Aradia ever would have thought. You feel a stab of jealousy at the thought of them curled up on the couch, watching this movie, but you quickly repress it. She fills a quadrant. Moirails are important. End of story.

You curl up on the couch quietly, at one end, with a bunch of pillows supporting your head. Equius sits at the other end. He glances at you constantly. It's enough to drive a troll mad, just these half-looks and brief glances all the time.

About halfway through the movie, you realize that this is probably a very sad movie. All the better. If it makes you cry, then maybe it will help your cause in a very positive way.

You were right - it is a terribly sad movie. You feel the sniffles coming on, and, despite your earlier thoughts, you tell yourself over and over again that you're not going to cry. You feel yourself moving over to get closer to Equius, just gravitating towards another living creature in a time of need. Even though this isn't exactly a crisis.

You rest your head on his shoulder, startling him out of his little trance. You think that he was merely engrossed in the movie - just for Nepeta, obviously a lie - but he may have been deep in thought. That's not good. Deep thinking is never a good sign.

He shifts uncomfortably. It's clear that the idea of a Peasant like you mingling with a Highblood like him still doesn't quite sit right in his mind. You snuggle up closer to him - despite his strength, his arm is really an amazing pillow - and, after a moment, he relaxes a little. You take this as an opportunity to wrap an arm around his waist - seize the opportunity while you have the chance!

Great - you've made him uncomfortable again. Good job, Aradia. Real smooth. You move as though to let go, but he takes your hand and holds it where it is. You seem to have won a small victory.

Its not long, however, before the movie finishes, and, as it finishes, Equius takes it as his time to leave. You're a little confused - you've just basically snuggled together on a couch, and now he's just going to leave without saying a word?

No. You're not putting up with that. You came here for a feelings jam, and you're having a feelings jam, whether he likes it or not.

You float up from the couch - thank Gog you were allowed to keep your wings - and fly straight to him. There is a million things you want to say, but there's really not enough time to convey them all properly, so you just do it like all the awful human redroms taught you, and kiss him gently.

He pulls away almost immediately and backs up into a chair. You look at him, slightly hurt. You weren't that bad at kissing, were you? You've never kissed anyone before, but still...

Equius seems to need a moment to catch his breath. "I... No... Wrong... Blood..." he gasps out, in the middle of all his sweating and breathing.

You just about slap him. You probably would, if you weren't so flushed. You still don't have an explanation for that. He's almost caught his breath, though, and you can see a stupid idea enter his head, so you flutter onto his lap and kiss him, harder this time.

He pulls away and tries to move, but he can't move without hurting you. You quite literally have him backed into a corner. He tries to move his head, and get away from you, but you're determined. There's no way he's getting away from this without talking to you.

You try to kiss him again, but he dodges and twists his neck to stare at you. "What are you doing?" he asks, without any sign of emotion in his voice.

You move in to peck him on the lips again. "Just this."

He shakes his head. "Aradia... You're a rustblood. A peasant. I'm a blueblood. Nobility. We... We can't..."

You put a finger to his lips. You thought he'd gotten over this. Blood colors really didn't matter here on Earth - but all that was forgotten in a moment of stress.

You wrap him in a tight hug, trying to help him calm down, and you feel him tremble against you. You can see the sweat on his brow. For some reason, this is an extremely tense moment for him. You can't imagine why.

You just keep him enveloped in your hug for a while, waiting for him to calm down a little. It takes a while - somehow, he had gotten really worked up - but eventually he was calm enough to accept your embrace, and even to return it.

You move in again, closing the gap between your heads, and kiss him gently. He moans slightly and kisses you back a little, before pulling away again.

Your frustration is almost tangible. What now?! This ridiculous obsession with blood colors is insane! You shake your head. "Equius, what's wrong? Am I doing something wrong? I thought you had a flush for me, or something..."

For the first time, the possibility that he's moved on - that his little flush has just gone, probably forever - really hits you. That would make your whole journey out to here absolutely pointless - and it would be absolutely heartbreaking, if he had moved on just as you figured out your real feelings for him.

He shooshes you with a finger. "Yes, Aradia, I have a flush for you," he responded with a sigh. "But that doesn't make this any less depraved."

You smile, both happily and a little frighteningly. "I really don't care how depraved it is," you say. "All I want is you."

And then you kiss him so hard he sees stars.


End file.
